Пятилетки хуже зомби: фильм Маленькие чудовища

Люди, которые умеют работать с маленькими детьми, не сходить при этом с ума и делать так, чтобы эти самые дети их самозабвенно любили, – гении. Об этом и сняли фильм «Маленькие монстры», а вовсе даже не о зомби, хотя зомби в кино тоже есть.

Дэйв – лузер с большой буквы Л. Он играет во вшивой группе вшивую музыку, а ради пропитания играет на улицах. С девушкой своей он только и делает, что эпично срется, пока все не становится настолько плохо, что Дэйву приходится попроситься жить к сестре. У сестры есть пятилетка, которого Дэйв решает использовать в своих гнусных целях: переодевает Дартом Вейдером, и они вместе идут простить руки девушки Дэйва. Ночью. Но она уже трахается с каким-то лысым.

Сестра Дэйва в ярости, и в качестве епитимьи ему приходится заниматься мальчиком. Но здесь находится приятный бонус – воспитательница дивно хороша! Так что Дэйв вовсе не против отвезти вместе с ней детишек на веселую ферму. Правда, у военных что-то опять жахнуло, и на ферму бредут орды зомби. И главное тут не просто спастись, но и сделать так, чтобы детишечки не испугались. Иначе детская травма и вот такой рубец.

АААА!!! Как же это смешно уже с самого начала!! Лупиточка Нионго, которая прописалась в ужастиках, с причесочкой и окулеле, в желтом платье, забрызганном кровищей – это просто истерика. Во всем этом, не поверите, даже нашлось место асисяю. Юмор черненький, спасутся не все. Шестилетка не въехал.

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